Fancy-um

niyacrossing:

This is an obamanation

plantvibes:

‎(✿ノ◡‿◡)ノ *:・゚✧*:・゚✧ reminder that if u can’t get out of bed today that’s okay and if u feel like crying on public transportation that’s okay and if u got a bad mark on a test that’s okay because there are still so many forests to explore and cities to get lost in and dogs to pet and u are only a small star in a big universe and u are doing so well

yourlifeyourvoice1d:

thisshitfunny:

cocknurse:

………

??

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME??

mushiemallows:

the office is such a stupid show i love it so much

queerchesters:

arterialspurt:

queerchesters:

fun date idea: Go down on me while I shop online with ur credit card

I don’t think someone could focus on the internet while I was going down on them.

you over estimate your skill and underestimate the joy of shopping

witneyhouston:

checkmate 

paragonikathryn:

falstafff:

i don’t understand why people don’t instantly respond to “what would your dream superpower be” with the ability to manipulate probability.
think about it. what’s the chance someone will drop 1mil in front of me? 0%? let’s make that 100%. what’s the probability i’ll wake up tomorrow and be X gender? 100%. what’s the probability my bathtub is filled with mac and cheese? 100%.

This is genius

stacksbreadup:

This deadass the funniest tweet ever.

t h e m e